FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

 

What is a funeral?

 

A funeral is part of our culture and customs for the recognition of the dead.   It incorporates accompanying rituals for the living to show their respect for the dead, as well as assist the survivors in the start of their journey of grieving. 

 

As we participate in a funeral, we are providing support for the family, letting them know that we are not only there for the good times, but more importantly, we are here to ease the pain and the sorrow of their loss, in any way we can.  It is also a time for us to say “good-bye” to someone who meant a great deal to us.

 

Who do I call first when someone dies and when should I call?

 

If a person dies in their own home or another private residence, the first call should be to the local police.  The police will contact the Medical Examiner’s Office and together they will aid in the process of the determination of the time of death and the doctor who will sign the death certificate, as well as the cause of death.  Once a release is given from the Medical Examiner Investigator, then the police officer will notify the family that they may contact the funeral home.

 

When the death occurs in a nursing home, most often, the nursing supervisor or staff will make the contact call for the family.

 

When the death occurs in a hospital, it falls to the family to place the call to the funeral home.

 

If the death occurs out of state, the first phone call should be made to the Kowalski Funeral Home.  Please refer to our other section “What to do when someone dies” for complete and further instruction.

 

Please know that the  Kowalski Funeral Home  is available 365 days a year, 24 hours a day, seven days a week.  A call can be placed to 908-486-711 at any time of the day or night, any day of the week.   We will always provide immediate assistance.   

 

Who controls the funeral?                                                                                

 

An individual conceivably can control his or her own funerals, by naming a funeral agent in the will.  The rights of funeral agents supersede the rights of all others, including spouses, domestic or civil union partners and relatives such as children and parents. 

 

The Executor (male) or Executrix (female) is the person named in a will to carry out the provisions of that specific will.  Families often think that the rights of an executor or executrix far exceeds the task of simply carrying out the directions contained in the will.  In particular, families believe that the executor or executrix have the authority to arrange funerals.  They do not.  The duties of the Executor or Executrix are limited and do not include the right to determine the final disposition of the body of the deceased, even when money has been set aside in the will to cover the funeral costs.  An Executor or Executrix can make funeral arrangements only if appointed as a funeral agent within the will or according to the lines of kinship as set by N.J. statute.

 

As a result, an Executor or Executrix of the estate, friends, clergy members, social workers, a specific relative and others can be named as a funeral agent.  A funeral director may not be named a funeral agent. 

 

To make a funeral agent appointment, an attorney needs to either draw up a new will or amend an existing will to include language similar to the following:

 

Appointment of Funeral and Disposition Representative

“I hereby nominate, constitute and appoint [insert name] to serve as my Funeral and Disposition Representative, pursuant to P.L. 2003, c. 261.  My representative shall have the authority and power to control the arrangements for my funeral and the disposition of my remains.  My Executor (Executrix) shall notify my Representative of this appointment and shall advise my Representative of the financial means available to carry out the Funeral and Disposition arrangements.  In the event [insert name] should predecease me or for some other reason mot qualify to serve as my Funeral and Disposition Representative, then I nominate, constitute and appoint [insert name of alternate] as my Funeral and Disposition Representative.”

After the death and before the will is probated, the Executor (Executrix) must inform the funeral agent of the appointment and the amount of money available to pay for the funeral.  If the deceased’s will does not name a funeral agent, then the right to control the funeral fails to these individuals as follows:

 

  1. The surviving spouse, domestic or civil union partner.
  2. A majority of the surviving adult children
  3. The surviving parent or parents
  4. A majority of the brothers and sisters
  5. Other next of kin of the decendent according to the degree of consanguinity.
  6. If there are no known living relatives, a cemetery and/or funeral home may rely on the written authorization of any other person acting on behalf of the decedent.  Under N.J. law neither the cemetery nor funeral home can be held liable for disposition based on such authorizations unless at the time there was “reasonable notice” that the person did not have the right to control the disposition.

Do I need to know anything to make funeral arrangements?                        

 

You do not necessarily need to “know” anything, but you should be guided every step of the way by your funeral director.  Be aware of choosing an independent funeral home and a licensed funeral director, who will be available to you at all times throughout the length of your funeral arrangements and services and even afterwards.  Ask questions and make sure that all pricing is explained to you.  A General Price List must be given to you and a Statement of Funeral Goods and Services Selected must be completed.  This statement will list the prices for all the aspects of the funeral that you are arranging for.  It must be signed by the funeral director and you are given a copy.  There is a great deal of decision making, so please take your time.  Make sure that you bring all the information that the funeral director has asked for.  Most importantly, tell your funeral director what you would like to do to make this ceremony as personal as possible.  Most, if not all of your requests can be carried out. 

 

What types of services are there?

 

Please refer to our “Funeral Service Options” heading under the general category of Services.  There you will find an abundance of examples of funeral services that can be done as suggested or even combined or altered to suit a families needs.

 

What is the purpose of embalming?

 

Embalming sanitizes and preserves the deceased and postpones the decomposition process.  It can also improve the appearance of a deceased who may have died by a traumatic death or illness.  Embalming is the means necessary to elongate to timeline from death to burial, cremation or entombment.  Family will use this time to arrange a funeral ceremony of their choice.

 

Is embalming required by law?

 

Except in certain cases, embalming is NOT required by law. 

Embalming may be necessary, however, if you select certain funeral arrangements, such as a funeral with viewing.  If you do not want embalming, you usually have the right to choose an arrangement that does not require you to pay for it, such as a direct cremation or immediate burial.

 

Embalming may also be necessary if a death was the result of a contagious disease that was reported or when the deceased is to be transported from one state to another by a common carrier.

 

No human remains may remain unburied or uncremated in New Jersey for more than 48 hours, unless embalmed or refrigerated.  (N.J.A.C. 8:9-1.1).  Each state will have its’ own specific rules and regulations.

 

Why should we have a public viewing?

 

Viewing is very much a part of the culture of a vast amount of ethnic traditions in today’s world.  Viewing also helps both family and friends accept the reality of the death and therefore aids in the grief process that naturally begins after death.  However no one should ever be forced into having a viewing or attending a viewing and this includes children.  Children of all ages are always welcome at the Kowalski Funeral Home.  We certainly encourage the family to explain to the children what the funeral home looks like, what happens during a viewing and funeral and to know that it’s ok to ask questions.

 

Is cremation different from other types of funerals?

 

A cremation simply is an alternative to an earth burial or entombment in a crypt.  It tells the funeral director what the final disposition of the deceased will be.  It does not dictate what type of funeral service you may want to have.  You can have a full traditional funeral with viewing, followed by a funeral mass in church or a religious or life celebration service in the funeral home.  The cremation usually takes place the next day.  Once the cremains are returned to the family, they again have a wide range of options as to what to do.  Some families will purchase urns and keep the cremains at home or place them in a niche.  Other families will bury the cremains in a family plot or scatter them in an appropriate place.  For additional ideas about funeral services with cremation, please refer to our “Funeral Service Options” heading under the general category of Services.   

 

What do I have to pay for at the time of the arrangements?                

 

When we are dealing with a church service or clergyperson, organist, sacristan, altar boys, cemetery or crematory, then the fees or honorariums for those activities must be paid for by the morning of the burial, cremation or entombment.  We advise the family in writing of the published fees and who the checks are payable to , so that nothing is left to their memory. 

 

Any and all charges incurred with the Kowalski Funeral Home, are due and payable 30 days after the date of the funeral.  Please note that this billing would include the casket selected, hearse, limousine or flower car, newspaper notices, if any, vault or other outer burial container if required or selected and additional items that may be wanted, such as clothing, prayer cards and register book to name a few.  As mentioned previously, a “Statement of Funeral Goods and Services Selected” is complied, signed by the funeral director and a copy if given to the family.  Once the thirty day period has passed, any outstanding balance will be subject to a 1 ½ % penalty per month.

 

Why are funerals so expensive?

 

A funeral is not expensive when compared to the cost of other major events in our lives, such as births or weddings.  A wedding today can cost at least, if not more, than three times the cost of a funeral.  However, because these events are happy occasions, their costs are rarely criticized.

 

A funeral home is a twenty-four hour, seven day a week, labor intensive business.  It maintains extensive facilities for the general public to use.  These expenses must be factored into the cost of a funeral.  Also, the cost of a funeral includes not only the facilities and merchandise, such as caskets, vaults, urns, prayer cards and newspaper notices, but it also involves all the work that a funeral director has to do, as outlined in the next question below.  Contrary to what most people think, funeral homes are generally family-owned with a very modest profit margin.

 

What do Funeral Directors do?

 

The scope of our job is limitless.  Among other things, we care for the dead and the living, we listen, we advise, we administer, we counsel. 

 

It is imperative that we make sure that a family is aware of all the options that are available to them in planning a funeral.  We try to shoulder the burden of their pain, in making the decision process as easy as possible.  We guide them along the path they choose and make the funeral ceremony the most memorable by incorporating attention to fine details.  That’s why the initial funeral arrangement conference with the Kowalski Funeral Home will take at least two hours.

 

We handle all the arrangements for the family, from the time of death to the time of the final disposition.  We take care of the transportation of the deceased, get the death certificate completed, then signed by the doctor and filed.  We obtain permits and certified copies of the death certificate.  We compile newspaper notices.  We arrange the floral displays.  We are present during all the viewing times to assist the family and friends.  We take donations for masses and charitable organizations.  We notify Social Security.  We make sure that the military burial honors detail will be present for a veteran’s funeral, as well as obtaining the flag and ensuring that the veteran will receive any other VA benefits that he or she may be entitled to. 

 

The list of our duties goes on and on….  Our job is to do everything that we possible can for the family, in both a professional but compassionate way.   

 

What is a pre-arranged funeral?                                                                          

 

A pre-arranged funeral is an opportunity for an individual to make decisions and knowledgeable choices regarding his or her own funeral.  It gives one the ability to say this is what I want done when I die.  Your family is not left wondering what they should do or how should they do it.  You have provided a full plan of action which will be carried out upon your death.  A pre-arranged funeral is also done at a time where there is no stress or grief overshadowing emotions.  Please refer to our “Pre-arranged Funerals” section for additional information and funding options.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Combining Quality and Cost is just One of the Things

Teresa V. Kowalski Does Best

 

Kowalski Funeral Home

515 Roselle Street, Linden, New Jersey 07036

Teresa V. Kowalski, Executive Director

NJ License No. 3489

908-486-7111 (Phone)     908-925-0933 (Fax)

E-mail:  TVKowalski@aol.com